Here’s the thing: I do not like to leave things up to fate/the universe/God/whatever. I am not one of those “go with the flow” people, one of those “let go and let God” people. I am more one of those “If I can’t create a 30-step plan to make it happen, it must be impossible and therefore will not happen,” people. I have always actually believed that: that if I can’t see every step of the way for how an outcome might be achieved, it cannot be achieved. Yes, I know how arrogant that sounds. Much of what I have accomplished to this point has been through sheer force of will, for the most part, and brute effort. Very bootstrappy, if you know what I mean (towards myself, mind you. I will never tell you to pull yourself up by your bootstraps. Unless your boot is falling off). In many ways it has worked well: I have a master’s degree, a fulfilling career, and beautiful daughter who I got pregnant with by obsessively analyzing my cycle and fertility signs. On the other…